Be Warned!

I find myself recently being drawn towards cautionary tales.

Well, let me rephrase that, I like the cautionary part of the cautionary tale. I mean, have you ever read Austenland? It's a book about how there's a Jane Austen theme park and you live this fake life and our heroine goes to it with rapture and then realizes how it's all empty and she wants imperfection in her life, and you, like her, are supposed to see the danger of ideals. When I finished I just saw that I really, really, really wanted to go to Austenland. I mean, of course it's fake. That's the point! You don't really want to brush your teeth with chalk, do you? It's also cool! A dream come true! Nobody wants to live there forever, that's why it's a park and not a community! Enjoy the ride, sister.

And then Adipose. In Season 4 of Doctor Who (with Donna, the best companion ever) there's a new diet craze in London. It's called Adipose and it makes the fat just "get up and walk away". All you have to do is take one pill a day, don't change your habits at all, and you lose exactly one pound of fat. But as it turns out, the pill makes your fat solidify into a baby alien being totally able to walk, talk and think, just composed entirely of fat. Of course, if you see the Adipose the firm has to kill you because you know the secret and will run screaming away from the pill and tell everyone. All I have to say is, WHO CARES?!! They could turn my fat into a car park if they liked. Do you have any idea how well that would work? And besides, if I can donate something I'm not using and turn it into a bouncing, baby, bundle of joy--well, there's my good deed for the day, isn't it? It's not like the babies themselves are at all dangerous. I get to feel good about myself and lose weight! And every time I ate something unhealthy I could just say, "There's for a poor baby Adipose that wants to born".

Whenever some mage/mystic/genie says "Be careful what you wish for..." I just want to say "Bring it on!" I will take wishes with weird consequences over regular life, any day.